2011+Week+7

=By Merrill's suggestion, this week our prompt shall be... What do you fear? Go!=

What do I fear? Not being able to do what I want, when I want to do it. Not being able to speak my mind, not being able to help anyone. Not being able to help myself. I am afraid of falling, Into a hole from which I can't escape. I'm afraid of turning out just like every other kid of this generation, Brain dead, addicted to texting, flannel, and bad music. I fear not being able to be me.

Adam “Communist Woodchuck” Bourgault

Fear. Fear is a funny thing. Isn’t it? The feeling of helplessness. Of being stuck. Or lost. Or afraid. What makes someone afraid? When they can’t stand to be around it? Can’t stand to see it?

I have many fears. But isn’t it the only thing to fear Is fear itself? Or is it the other way around. And would it matter? If one only feared fear Then what could they fear? My fears can be summed up. Into a few words. Quiet easily. Social phobia.

See? Two words. That doesn’t take much space. But it means a thousand things. Don’t it?

If you don’t know. It means I’m afraid of you. It means, even now While you’re reading this, I’m scared. Of my own breed. How pathetic is that?

If feels strong. This fear. So much so, People call it, A Social Anxiety.

It usually starts out easy. A bit of fiddling, Tapping, Wandering eyes, And an unfocused mind.

Then, if the situation calls for it. My mind suffocates me. Making the air thick and hot. Making cold sweat run down my back, My forehead. My hands turn clammy And I’m afraid to touch anything But my fists.

Then my whole body pulses. Like, When you get a cut On your finger You put the bandaid on too tight And you can feel your heartbeat. Almost painful it is. That’s how it feels. Only it’s all over. My forehead, My hands, My arms. I can literally feel my heart beat Against my bones. Feel it move inside me.

That’s another thought that scares me Sometimes I scare myself. I drive myself into that. Just because I’m no longer careful. I’m tried of it.

The most I’ve been afraid. What it felt like. Is indescribable.

I just wish People knew. How much they scare me Because, I don’t want to be afraid. Not anymore.

Airazena "TeachMeToNotBeAfraid" Panda


 * Praise for the Pill Bottle Babies**

The dreaded place, Overweight nurses with their doughy skin rising like yeast bread under their pastel scrubs The place of straight lines and whiskey tears Of bleach smells and Phd’s

They’re towed through automatic doors, in a heel-dragging-fight for each step nails making bloody half moons in already scarred fists

this is place where they take their well sharpened pencils and carve HIGH RISK into your back And seeping with spite you smile through bared teeth hate leaking out between the crooked ones, and the gap between the front two.

Here is where the high riskers play With greasy hair and poor social skills They sit quietly, Stoic, drugged up and sullen, bloodshot eyes staring into your clean minded soul

These pill popping angels are sharp as blades Though the corners are padded And the silver wear rounded And the white noise machine blurring any silence that comes to

Those shove-under-the-rug-children, the ones hiding in the cracks They’re pill bottle babies They’re the red-button-for-emergency-please-make-yourself-comfortable kids Sent down from God Murdered by stigma Now haunting the linoleum halls of this place they call hell

And in truth, these insignificant divine beings are my worst fear Stoic sausage cases of Chlorpromazine, Prozac, and Pot I count my blessings, say my prayers and hope to god That I’ll never be one of them

Charlotte "Not written in two minutes" Feinberg

**Fear**
Don’t be afraid Whenever I say that line, I feel like I’m talking to a little child A little, crying child that is afraid of the boogie monster hiding under his bed Well, I guess that is what you represent right now A little child that uses fear to block out a world that doesn’t fit to their interests That is exactly what you are doing right now You don’t like the world as it is so you fear to leave your little bubble The little bubble that is your world This fear bubbling up inside of you is creating an evil being A being too selfish to think about how anyone else feel Well, let me tell you, no one the world as it is But hiding in a bubble of fear in not helping anyone Especially not you So instead of hiding under a layer of fear How about we burst that bubble and face the world as it is Hiding and running does nothing We need to face the world and do everything we can do to change it And if you can’t even do that much for yourself You deserve to rot in your little bubble By William "Afraid of fear" Emerson